Well, here's the first post on something that I never really saw myself doing. I have no expectations of this blog. I have no grand expectations of millions of followers and beign able to retire off of the google advertising revenue, etc. This is simply a place for me to put into words what I feel. I would welcome feedback and comments from anyone who passes through. Even feel free to pop in with the obligatory "you're a raving idiot!" LOL!
To start things off, here's a little about me:
I'm in my mid 30's. I'm married (~10 yrs) with 2 kids, 2 dogs, and a cat. I have a pretty good job as an engineer. I love my God, my family, my country (in that order), and then all the typical guy stuff - i.e. sports, cars, hunting (I don't hunt anything I won't eat, but I don't begrudge those that do), and just shooting the breeze with friends. I consider myself to be a Christian, but FAR from perfect. I have many flaws (hopefully most of which will get pointed out during this blog), but I think I put out an honest effort to do my best (well, most of the time).
I acknowledge that I don't always tell others around me how I feel. Mostly because I think it's making the situation better by not letting emotions get out of control. How much I share is (in my opinion) determined by my opinion of how much that person can handle. I.e., if I feel a person would rather just throw out insults than have an honest discussion about an issue, I'll avoid it alltogether. If someone will sit and talk it out, I'll talk all night long and share the good and the bad - and accept whatever is thrown my way as well.
Now, to the fun part.
As an employee, all I really ask for is my paycheck when it's due and an occasional thank you for a job well done.
As a father, there's no more rewarding feeling than to hear your child tell you they love you.
As a husband, a "thank you" for bringing home the paycheck and helping around the house.
Everything else is gravy.
Lately, the "I love yous" from one child and infant smiles from the other have been flowing like crazy - LOVING it!
I was handed extra accounts and asked to interview for a promotion after 18 months on the job.
My wife sat on the computer and updated facebook, went to bed, told me I made her itch when I touched her then rolled over and went to sleep...
Remember the sesame street skit "which one of these things doesn't belong"? LOL!
This has been my life as of late. My wife and I lead pretty blessed lives overall. She's able to stay at home with the kids, I work and make enough (but I'm certainly not looking at early retirement) to handle the bills. I do most of the cooking and she does most of the rest of the housework (well, I take out the trash too, but that really doesn't count). We take turns bathing the kids and putting them to bed. Other than that, my wife knocks it out and does a really good job at it. When I want to spend time together (and no, I'm not just talking about sex), there's no time for me. There's time for facebook. Time for scrapbooking. Time for talking to her mother on the phone. But none for me... Now, I'm sure there isn't enough for the other things she likes to do (like the things I already mentioned). I don't expect to trump the kids. I would hope to get some one on one time over snapfish though! Honestly, it's not a disaster. We're great friends. We talk at dinner (when the kids aren't screaming). We compliment each other well - and that's about it. I catch myself wishing for the college days when we would spend hours just talking to each other. Hanging out. Doing nothing. Now, 20 minutes into a date (in the very RARE times that happens) and she wants to call and check on the kids.
Am I asking too much that at least one night a week we spend it together? Truth be told, I do occasionally get jealous of my kids. I hold no ill will against them, of course but I just long for what they get - one on one time. Today, she took a nap with our youngest and I was working from home. She slept for 3 hours. I did catch myself laying on the other side of the baby for an hour (during lunch, if my boss is reading this! ;). Immediately before and immediately after, there were tons of things that needed to be done (and in fairness, I had to work too). At 10:30 when we went to bed, it was time for sleep as there was too much to be done (oh, and I made her itchy! :). I tried to initiate sex and she told me that if I wanted it to just do it so she could get to sleep. Hardly the response I'd hoped for...
Well, I'm tired and going to bed. Work tomorrow! Glad I love my job! Thankful I have one at all!
No comments:
Post a Comment